Secret to  a Long Life

A  passer-by noticed an old woman sitting on her front step: "I couldn't help  noticing how happy you look! What is your secret for such a long, happy life?"  

"I smoke 4 packs of cigarettes a day", she said. "Before I  go to bed, I smoke a nice big joint.  Apart from that, I drink a whole  bottle of Jack Daniels every week, and eat only junk food.  On weekends I  pop a huge number of pills and do no exercise at all."

"This is  absolutely amazing at your age!!!!", says the passer-by. "How old are you?"  

"Twenty four"